taking a break....take 2

i've just realised....i'm depending more n more on caffeine(eg.coffee) to get me going...becoming a caffeine junkie in other words,hahaha...and to remember how much i hated the taste of coffee until A levels...and here i am..becoming a coffee junkie,the changes that can be inflicted upon us by challenges of life...oh well,it's not that entirely bad,since it helps me concentrate and keeps me up when i usually already fall asleep...but i will keep this newfound addiction only during exam period for a variety of reason;1)i still don't like the taste that much, 2) don't want to let my body creating resistance to caffeine(that would mean i have to drink MORE coffee for the same effect..) 3)...i suppose i will think of more reason soon,lol

Games...is still my best source of comfort...not to mention my worst source of dread during this stressful period..i just can't help it... games is some sort of an escape for me...not just escape from the stress...an escape from the despair to know how difficult it is to get urself study,and to remember eveything that u've studied...games give u a sense of control..u can save and load whenever u want.,makes u wish that u can save and load the things u've studied as easy as just clicking buttons..sigh....and not to mention,the guilt u feel after playing games,realising the hours u've wasted...although in a way that drives me to study,albeit that sour feeling of studying due to guilt

and it also irritated me..that i can't find a source of comfort during this period...i've turn to few sources...but....one irritates me coz trying to tell me wat to do,although i know it is meant to help(i really DO) but that's not wat i'm looking for(or maybe the way it is delivered is incorrect...i dunno)... one can't handle my stress and become irritated as well(which disappoints me,coz i was able to be cool and try to help as much as possible when that 'one' was stressful...or maybe coz it's my own sentiment and disappointment due to some events...)
oh well...life goes on....probably this is just another learning curve for me,set by Allah,the one who truly loves me as well as the rest of humanity,kinda type of hard love...but i suppose all of us need that once a while :)